Do we forgive?

We are told that everyone deserves forgiveness. Whether or not you come about this from a religious standpoint, forgiving others is good for both parties. I know it's not healthy to carry resentment and anger. I know that the act of forgiving another can be very theraputic. What I don't know is this: do you forgive someone who doesn't want your forgiveness?

What if the person in question thinks they've done nothing wrong? To forgive them for a perceived wrong would seem insulting. And, if I am not asked for forgiveness, I honestly don't give it. I wish I could free myself of the burden of resentment and forgive, but I find that near impossible for me. Even when I forgive, I never forget.

So tell me your opinion. Send this post to friends who might have one as well. If someone doesn't want your forgiveness, do you give it to them anyway? And how?

A beautiful day for a wedding

The day started for me in a beautiful way. Josh returned early from work and we were able to talk about the day ahead. We lay in bed and let the day slowly develop outside the open window. As the sun began to fill the room we looked forward to the day ahead of us.

My fiance's sister was calm as she prepared for her walk down the aisle. She dressed calmly and sat so still as I curled and pulled at her hair and her friend Casey curled her eyelashes and added blush to her cheeks. She looked more beautiful than I have ever seen her. The night stayed warm, the heat lingered on the surface of the bay as the yacht cruised slowly across the water. They were glowing, radiant, and full of love.

Congratulations!

I love our love

As we sat across our coffee table with our jeweler on Wednesday night the feelings bounced around my head, not finding words to express them. My future husband slipped his future wedding band on his finger and I think my heart stopped.

He's mine.

He is going to come home to me. He is going to wear jewelry, for me! He is going to pledge before God and everyone most important to us that he will love me until the end of time. This is a BIG deal. Somehow, though, I'm not scared.

Our love, is our love, and girl I love our love.
Heaven has given this love to only us...
This love is only us...
-David Martin

I was asked last week by a dear friend from High School an important question.
"People tell me that 'you just know'" she said. "And I'm afraid that I won't just know. Did you?"
I thought about this and responded, "I guess that the apprehension fades and one day you realize that you can get married. I would explain as the opposite of 'you just know', more like 'you don't not know.'"*
"Thank God" she said. "I can understand that."

What I tried to express to her is that one day you realize that you have no fear of marriage, no doubt, and the way is clear. I don't think it happens the other way around. I don't think that one day you just know that the person is right for you; it's that you slowly begin to lose every bit of protest within you and accept that the person is less and less wrong for you, and then you know.

I leaf through a book he filled out for me. The book (which I highly recommend) is called "What I Love About You." You are prompted to write answers to questions that help you express, in ways you would never think to express, all of the dimensions of love you have for the person. I bought us a matching set for Valentine's Day. In it he has written the funny, touching, and strange ways that let me know that he loves me for who I am inside: my love of kicking wild mushrooms and jumping in puddles, the inside jokes that represent the early days of our relationship, and our wishes and dreams for each other.

I am overwhelmed, flattered, content.

I glanced down at my ring finger, my future wedding band sparkling in place beneath my engagement ring. I smiled, slid it off my finger, and returned it to the jeweler. There will be a time for that; and I can't wait.

*I realize that "you don't NOT know" is a double negative which would imply the positive "you know" but try to follow my train of thought here.

I believe in miracles

My grandpa had his blood work done, and has been nervous about these test results for weeks, bracing himself for the worst. I understand, and empathize. He has been so strong and has put up with so much. He scheduled his follow up and waited to find out how bad the cancer is, and how many treatments they would put him through.

He found out that he is in remission.

We didn't think this possible. We are overjoyed.

Thank you.